Is This Finally The End?

Has this been the craziest week in the news?

Where do I start?

A South Carolina inmate is suing Michael Vick for '$63,000,000,000 Billion Dollar[s]' because he says Vick stole this man's pit bulls and sold them on ebay so that he could purchase missiles from Iran.

Yo! Academy, a charter school in Memphis, lost its charter. Yes, there is (was) a school in Memphis called "Yo! Academy." What can I say about that?

More Memphis news. Woman has stillborn baby, buries in the backyard and is busted because a dog dug up the baby and dragged it into her driveway where neighbors promptly freaked out. Oh, but that was last year. This year the same thing happened again. However, this time only one dead baby has been found and a medical exam reveals she was pregnant with twins.

But let's hear her explain it. Her spuhling makes me buhleev she graduated from Yo! Academy:

"I know it seems that I am a heartless and cruel person because of what I did to my baby. I am not a bad person. But on that day I made a bad choice. It's hard for me to except what happen. I don't remember everything. I am sorry words can't express how I feel. I can't change what happen in the pass for what I did. I can make sure I don't make the same mistake in the future."

What does she perceive as her mistake? Getting pregnant or burying babies in her backyard?

It's so phucking hot in Memphis right now that we're even beyond the ole "hey pal, hot enough for ya?" comments. I figure a statement like that'll get your ass whooped.

Dumbest athlete ever. Cyclist Christophe Moreni is pissed about his 2 year ban from cycling after testing positive for testosterone boosting:

It is like giving the same sentence to someone who stole an apple and to someone who robbed a bank," the Italian declared in light of the fact that riders caught for blood doping got the same suspension.

Sure his offense was minor...er, he used illegal substances, right? Note previous statement as sarcastic.

Keep going Christophe:

I have bought a plant-based paste over the internet to stimulate the natural production of testosterone. I wasn't aware that I could have a problem with the doping control. For me, it was like taking amino acids or protein. I know many riders who take it.

Um, you weren't aware that illicitly boosting testosterone levels would cause problems at doping control?

The Italian, who acknowledged that he made a costly mistake, added that he had other products with him that the police seized. Tribulus terrestris (a plant to enhance sports performances as well as the love life), Andro Max (a testosterone booster) and a corticoid-based paste, which Moreni had "not opened and for which I had a prescription."

I mean, what else can I say? Christophe, come on dude. Come on.

And finally, to make everyone depressed. The kickass "Thriller" prisoner video might be one huge human rights abuse case? Thanks for killing my joy Kenny.
I guess it's not really a "case" since these prisoners have no rights anyway. I figure they dance so they'll be allowed to live.